THERE IS A LIGHT INSIDE YOU THAT CANNOT BE STOPPED (John 14:12)

I realized something early on in ministry. The majority of us want to find our place and shine our light in this world, but somewhere along the way we stopped believing we have what it takes!

We’ve been given a promise. Jesus said when he left this earth he placed in our hearts His light. A light that is unstoppable, and more powerful than anything we could ever know.

“I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works, because I am going to be with the Father … and I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you. He is the Holy Spirit who leads into all truth.” John 14: 17

Did you see it? He died, and rose again, and left HIS light (the Holy Spirit) inside you to do EVEN GREATER WORKS than Him!

It is a crazy thought for me to wrap my mind around. So crazy in fact the enemy knows it. He doesn’t want us to grasp the idea that we have a force so powerful within us that it would literally knock him off his feet if we tapped into it.

When Jesus was about to be arrested, Judas led an army of 300-600 soldiers to capture him. One man against 300-600 soldiers? Really?

Picture this scene in John 18: 4-6. Jesus asked the soldiers “Whom do you seek?” They responded, “Jesus of Nazareth.” What happens next blows me away. All Jesus does is say, “I AM HE” and every last one of the soldiers were so overcome by the power sent out through Jesus’ words that they literally “fell to the ground” (vs. 6, ESV).  It was as if this invisible force swept them off their feet and they stumbled, staggered and couldn’t remain standing in his presence.

This is the power Jesus left inside you!

The enemy of our destinies is hard at work trying to distort our vision and make us doubt this Truth because he is SCARED! He trembles at the thought of us grabbing hold of this TRUTH! So he continually whispers into the ear of all light bearers – all believers, “YOU’RE NOT ENOUGH!”

It is an ingenious fear tactic! He is out to dim our light in any way he can. He wants you to hide it and make you believe you’re not worthy to share it, you’re not ready, you’re not ENOUGH!

Why have so many of us taken the bait? We have believed the enemies’ lies making it hard for us to believe that God would really want to use us – to shine through us. We have this unbelievable gift inside of us just waiting to burst forth and shake up the world around us for God’s glory. But in order for us to experience the power of God inside of us we have to begin to believe it is there for the taking. We’ve got to stop listening to the enemies’ voice. His voice causes fear to grow where power was meant to.

Any number of YOU’RE NOT’s can float through your mind throughout your day. It happens so much that we don’t even try to fight it anymore. Ladies, we have to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH and refuse to listen to anything BUT the TRUTH of who God says that we are! Let me let you in on a little secret. GOD WILL NEVER TELL YOU YOU AREN’T ENOUGH! BECAUSE HE ALREADY KNOWS THAT YOU ARE.

The Truth is:  “Whom the son sets free is free indeed” (John 8:36).

We are free from all condemnation, shame, sin, hopelessness, depression, anxiety, fear, and despair, but the problem is our minds won’t let us walk free!

You, yes YOU, reading these words right now, have a POWERFUL light inside you that God handcrafted for your heart to hold and share with His world.  LET’S GET BOLD TOGETHER and have each other’s back as women! Let’s knock fear flat on its back by believing in who God uniquely designed us to be and encouraging other women to do the same! The world needs our light!

Ladies, if you’re not listening to the voice of God and who He says you are, you will never discover who you were meant to be! So perk up your ears, tune into His heart for you and set that LIGHT free. Boldly shine for him, unashamed, letting nothing hold you back!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

P.S. Coming soon are two powerful tools to help you experience FREEDOM and walk in your destiny! Keep an eye out for the release of my new book, Shining Freely, and the companion devotional guide, The 40 Day Journey!

 Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant…For even the Son of Man came not be be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many. Matthew 20:26-28 NLT

This girl has had her comfort zone busted wide open! I feel like I’ve been plucked out of my cozy corner of the world and place smack dab into a sea of unknowns.  We don’t like the unknowns or to be uncomfortable but what I have found, is that the places I’ve most wanted to run from, but didn’t, allowed God to lead me to greater levels of freedom!

I’ve been my own boss for over ten years now, running things how I want it and doing what I wanted, when I wanted. But, life called for a change! I now find myself in a place where I have not only one boss but multiple bosses to answer to. The funny thing is, I asked God to teach me how to love like him. The first thing he did was take away the titles I’d been hiding behind: “Co-founder” and “President” .

What better way is there to learn to love like him than to be made completely low?

He came to serve. To become the lowest of low. Beaten. Whipped. Spit upon. The ransom for us. Never once did he place his needs above those he came to serve.

Sometimes we have to question, “Do we really want what we are asking for?”

To love like him – means sacrifice. It means allowing ourselves to be uncomfortable for the comforting of others.

When I finally was willing to give up what I thought brought me the greatest value, I learned what true love looked like – what it felt like in my heart! And it overwhelmed me. His love is so unbelievable. I believe that if we learn to love first and to love like him, everything else we are seeking will fall into place.

Are you willing to be made low? We change the world by the love we show. Change the world with me. Let’s learn to love like He loves!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light

                                                            “I’m single-minded in pursuit of you” (Psalms 119:10, MSG)

I am so excited to introduce to you a new resource that is coming soon to Shine Healing Ministries call, “The 40 Day Journey”! This is online program and workbook that will serve as your next-step guide to assist you in experiencing and putting into practice the principles laid out in my new book, Shining Freely: Overcome Your Past and Set Your Purpose Free. Below is a description about The 40 Day Journey and a sneak peak into day 1! Enjoy 🙂

Jesus initiated the greatest rescue mission ever known – just over 2,000 years ago – when He died on the cross so that we could be free! Today, many of us still need rescued from ourselves! The 40 Day Journey is your guide to learning how to rest in God’s way and cease from yours so that God can begin to open your heart to the “immeasurably more” he has planned for you! And the best part about it, you won’t be alone. God wants to walk with you on this 40 Day pause of discovery with the goal of cultivating a deeper relationship with Him so that He can set you free from the limiting mindsets and self-protective strategies your heart holds. It’s time! Time to lay down your way for God’s way! Accept the challenge before you to pause for 40 Days to let God do in your life what only He can. Daily encouragement and simple action steps will be provided to help you succeed on your journey to freedom. May prayer is that your heart be flooded with Light and leave you forever changed. Don’t wait! Encounter God, Discover you, and Experience Freedom!

Day 1 Expectation and Praise

Thought of the day: Praise prepares your heart for what God is about to do!

I will CEASE today by choosing to:

Connect with God

Daily Word

Psalm 145:2-3 (NLT)

I will praise you every day; yes, I will praise you forever. Great is the Lord! He is most worthy of praise! No one can measure his greatness.

Daily Worship

Do it again by Elevation Worship

Note here how this verse and song spoke directly to your heart:

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Examine My Heart

Lord, is there something in my heart that makes it hard for me to abandon myself fully to you in worship and believe that you will do great things in me and for me during this 40 Day Journey? What mountains do I need to begin to believe that you can move for me? Now, seek God’s view. What does he want you to begin to believe about his ability to move the mountains and part the sea that appears impossible before you?

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Allow God to Open My Heart to His View

I want you to know that I have plans for your good, plans to infuse hope and life into the dreams I have fashioned in your heart (Jeremiah, 29:11). The things I will begin to speak into your heart during this journey will be hard for you to fathom because I see you and your situation so vastly different than what you can currently comprehend. It will require faith, but luckily, you only need faith the size of a tiny, little mustard seed and then I can move mountains (Matthew, 17:20). Take this journey with me and watch me do immeasurable more than you could ever think, dream, or imagine in your life (Ephesians, 3:20). Walk to the edge of the sea before you, the sea you don’t believe you can cross and take that first step. Feel the coolness of the water on your feet and watch as I begin to part the sea before you. I promise to make a way where there is no way! I did it for Moses, and I can do it for you.

Surrender to God’s Way

In this time of prayer visualize walking to the edge of the sea you thought you would never cross and taking that first step. God will meet you there. Be willing to hand over to him anything that you need to cease from that hinders your praise and ability to believe that God can do the impossible in your life during this 40 Day Journey. Cut your connection with the limiting mindsets (things you speak or believe) and protective strategies (things you do) that are holding you back by asking God to forgive you for partnering with views and actions that don’t line up with his truth!

Write your own personal prayer of surrender here:

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Expect God to Move on My Behalf

Expect mountains to move and the sea to be parted. The waters before you are no match for God’s presence inside you! Sing his praise. Thank him for what he is about to do in your life through the next 40 days and beyond!

Visualize a truth-filled thought based on what God revealed to your heart today and renew your mind in it all day long. Speak it, repeat it, be it!

My truth-filled focused thought for today:

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Pause and Be Still

Write down any thoughts, impressions, or images that are coming to your mind. Grant yourself the freedom to visualize it fully and creatively express what God is revealing to your heart in any format that is best for you. Let the images and words that come to mind become powerful snapshots you recall throughout the day to infuse your heart with hope for the journey.

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End of Day Reflection

Note how your truth-focused view impacted your day and any way that God moved in your life as you practiced ceasing from your way to surrender to his.

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Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert. IS. 43:19

Do you struggle like me at times to believe that the new thing is ever going to come? Sometimes it can feel like we have been waiting forever for our wounds to be heal, our family to be restored, that new job opportunity to happen, or our hope to refill. And nothing. Or so it seems.

One of my favorite Pastors, Steven Furtick, said that, “Revelation is more powerful than reason.”  We don’t and won’t always know the “why” or the reasons for what we go through, but, God’s revelation (his truth) is always available to us and is jam-packed with his power. No matter what we go through we can seek God’s perspective and believe in his goodness and this is where freedom from the agony of unanswered “why’s” lies.

Here are a few things to ponder?

Why do we  default to thinking that the devil is attacking us instead thinking that God  is using this situation or uncomfortable place to free us from something planted in our heart from long ago? Maybe just maybe he is going to use this moment you felt rejected and unwanted at church to heal your heart from the rejection you felt when your daddy left and never looked back. Maybe just maybe he is going to use this trial to help you learn to trust him with your heart again, because he lost it years ago when you felt betrayed and broken by the very people who should have kept you safe. Maybe just maybe…(fill in the blank).

Could God be using this time in your life to propel you to something greater and develop the characteristics in you that you will need in order to not be overcome by where he wants to take you?

Is the enemy’s attack really bigger than what God can create out of it? Do you believe that Greater is He that is in you than in the world and that he can work all things for your good?

Why do we have a tendency to assume the worst of God? We need to flip our view. He doesn’t promise life here will be cheery and bliss, he actually promises the opposite. “I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world” (John 16:33 NLT).

Do you know what was happening in Jesus’ life when he spoke these words to his disciples? ONE BIG HUGE TRIAL. He was headed to the cross to give his very life for us.  His next words were: “Father, the hour has come.”  Next came betrayal, arrest, torture, and death.  But above all came the greatest GOOD ever known! His victory became our victory.  A victory that gives us the ability to stare our past in the face and every last sin we have ever committed and say, “You no longer have power over me! Jesus defeated you –  sin, failure, hopelessness, depression, abuse, shame, abandonment, anxiety, rejection and I am free.”

Have you ever really thought about the fact that Jesus’ trial, sorrow, betrayal, death had to happen for us to be free? Pain is simply a part of this life, BUT I choose to believe that not matter what comes my way God will use it to shape me, transform me, and free me more and more from myself. His ways are beautiful and good and he always has our best interest in mind.

Could this trial, time of sorrow, betrayal, rejection, loss, hardship, loneliness be the very thing  he will use to free you, to bless you so that you can become an unstoppable blessing to others?

Hum…something to think about! If we keep perceiving God through the lens of punishing us or the enemy’s attacks as bigger than what God can do, we will continue to feel defeated. I often need to remind myself that GOD IS 100% GOOD AND HE IS ALWAYS FOR ME , even when time keeps ticking.

Believe, especially, when you cannot see, that God is working behind the scenes for your good!

Be blessed my friends and don’t let anything stop you from shining your LIGHT!

Until next time.

He reached down from heaven and rescued me; he drew me out of deep waters.                                                                   Psalm 18:16

We all need rescued at times. I know I have gotten myself into some pretty sticky situations before and unfortunately have repeated the same mistakes over and over. Why do we do this to ourselves?

I was frustrated this week. I am changing roles- changing focus. New job, new ministry direction and nothing seems to be moving  fast enough.  In the book, Love Talk,  by Les & Leslie Parrott, I realized my #1 safety need is TIME.  I am a check-it-off-my-list kinda gal. Everything needs to be done YESTERDAY! So often when I find my timing and God’s timing aren’t lining up,  then my mind takes over and anxiety swirls around me like a mini tornado spinning me out of control. In frustration, I look at my watch and ask God, “Do you know how much time has past since you spoke your promises in my heart? That transition, Lord, you remember? You said it was coming? YOU’RE LATE!!!”

But then there is another part of me that screams, “Can’t I just stay right here?”  I wonder what must have been going through Peter’s mind when he was straddling the side of the boat with one foot still safely tuck within a place he knew well, and one toe about to dip into the complete unknown. The way the story appears, he jumped all in without thinking. No white-knuckle grip, just a full out leap (Matthew 14:28-30).

I’m there now, straddling the boat, but sheepishly admit, I don’t feel so brave. God is calling me to something new, something bigger than me. Do I jump all in? Or will I stay stuck in a place of false security and wonder why I’m so frustrated?

Sometimes we need rescued from ourselves. God’s hand is always there to catch us. Peter did it. Not flawlessly, but he did it. He stepped out completely and when he needed rescued from himself and the fear that over took him, guess who was right there? Yep, the One who always is. God’s hand is constant & never failing.  Boy, do I need that reassurance sometimes. Especially now, when I am straddling this boat of known and unknowns. I know in my head that God has big plans for me and is doing a new thing in me, but my heart is still struggling to perceive it (Isaiah 43:19).  It is blinded by fear.

“What if I fall?”

“What if I fail?”

“What if I totally screw all this up?”

So what if I do – God has already promised me his hand!

I don’t know when I am gonna learn that this life is a duet. I can’t but HE CAN through me! I guess I have to get the point where I jump out and abandon my comfort and my false security for the only true source of security I will ever know. God’s heart for us is unbelievably good. He wants so much more for us than we could ever imagine. I wonder how it must sadden him that so many of us spend our whole lives straddling the boat afraid to trust him and believe in his Word! 

Pastor Steven Furtick said, “Sometimes we want God to do a big thing and we won’t even do the basics.”

He can’t do the big things in our lives when we are too afraid to get out of the boat. Our job is to trust and he promises to do the rest.

Step out. Abandon your fear. His hand will be there. He is the greatest RESCUER the world has ever known!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7

I took a HUGE leap this week. I gave my book, Shining Freely, to a publisher! Three long years. The last three years have contained some of the hardest challenges of my life, but have also been the most life changing I have ever know! I was nervous, my heart was pounding as I went to press send.  Fear and excitement were fighting for their place in my mind. But I am proud to say FEAR DIDN’T WIN! I did it. I persevered through all the times I wanted to quit, all the times I questions who am I to do this. At every turn God kept reminding me of my WHY!

I want to see you, me, all of us, SET FREE to shine our light without restraint for Christ! I want nothing to hold us back!

Fear always surfaces before you are about to do something beyond you! But in order to be free to walk out the plans God has for us , we have to break-up with our fear. It is our most toxic relationship.  Fear stops us from believing that God can do great things through us. It stops us from connecting, dreaming, and being all we were created to be!

It is time to break up with your fear so that God can propelled you forward into the life he wants to give you! Pause for a moment and reflect on how you have partnered with your fear. What ways are you trusting your fear more than God? Take those things you identified to God in prayer – asking his forgiveness for trusting your fear more than him. Then write your break-up letter. Be bold and fight back! Break up with the words you speak that create fear. Break up with the actions you do that align you with your fear and clearly identify the lies your fear has convince you of.

Be real with yourself and God about the ways your fear has controlled you. You need to make a commitment to yourself to say and do the things that lead to healing and make the dreams God has for you possible!

Be sure to end your letter with a clear focus by crafting a phrase or using a quote or a Bible verse that encourages you to keep pressing on towards the prize that God has for you. This will help to reset your thinking in the right direction every time your fear resurfaces. Make a new promise to yourself and align your heart with the truth in God’s Word.

Why wait, don’t let fear gain any more ground in your life. Take a few moments to fill in the blanks of your Dear Fear letter now!

Dear Fear,

You have robbed me of the life I want to live for way too long. I have allowed you to tell me I am ____________________________________________________________________________. (E.g. worthless, unloveable, hopeless, abandoned, inadequate, a fake). You’ve convinced me_______________________________________________________________________.(Write what your fear makes you believe about people, God, or your future).

I promised myself ___________________________________________________________ (Write what you vowed to do because of this fear: “I will never…) and I protected myself by ________________________________________________________________________________.

(Write protective strategies here: isolate, people please, control others).

But now, I say, “No more!” Lord, I break up with my fear today! I sever the power that the fear of ________________________________________________________ (E.g. rejection, disapproval, being a disappointment) has had over my life.

Forgive me for the promises I made to myself and the ways I have protected myself that have kept me from being able to open my heart to believe in your desire to use me in great and mighty ways. I believe that what I confess to you, you break its hold over me and give me the power to overcome! Lord, I will no longer let fear guide my steps. I hand all control over to you. May your truth be my rudder. Lord, replace my fear with your peace and open my heart to love again.

Lord, today I partner with your plan for my life and embrace your truth in my heart. Every time fear creeps in, I will hold on to your promise and speak back to my fear by saying: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________  (Write a truth in God’s Word you need to begin to believe here).

This is goodbye Fear,

Be bold and take back the dreams God is fashioning in your heart! Renew your mind daily in the truth that: God’s mighty power is within you to accomplish infinitely more than you  can ever ask, dream, think, or image! (Ephesians 3:20).

Be blessed ~ Be a Light

Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

As a parent it can be disturbing to see in your kids characteristics you don’t want to admit you possess. Especially, when you run smack dab into the reality of, “Oh my gosh, I do that. She learned that from me!” I am grossly competitive. I don’t know if there is even a word to describe how competitive I am. I can’t even play a fun game of family baseball, an Easter tradition, without trying to win. Ugh. Ugly, I know. Even uglier is when the characteristic that are overboard in you, bleed into the little ones you are raising.

This became glaringly obvious one spring afternoon. We decided as a family to go to the local bike path for the first time since our youngest had learned how to ride without training wheels. Excited that we could all ride together and enjoy the scenery as a family, off we went. It turns out that competition turned into comparison can rob all involved of any fun that could be had. What should have been an exciting time, wasn’t. Our youngest had a new-found freedom to ride without restraint, but her mind couldn’t let her enjoy where she was. She was so worried about keeping up with her older sister, who had been riding without training wheels for three years now, that she failed to enjoy the journey.

My little one pushed herself tirelessly to try and keep up, always looking ahead at the distance between her and where her older sister was. At one point, she jumped off her bike, grabbed it with her little hands, and picked it up. She started running with all her might, but the weight of it dragged her down. Grunting, panting, and exhausting herself, all in an attempt to catch up to a place she wasn’t yet meant to be! When we are carrying something that was meant to carry us, we end up with skinned knees and wonder why. This was an “ah ha” moment for me for sure. God does that. He gives you a glimpse of something you don’t want to see, so He can free you from what you don’t know exist.

That little girl running with the bike, feeling left out and like she missed the boat, that was me; pushing, pulling, dragging, and carrying what didn’t seem to be going fast enough. Trying to make happen in my timing what God knew I wasn’t yet ready for. Thoughts swirled in my mind, “Look at what she is doing. My ministry isn’t as big as her’s. She is so young and I am so much older and I am not performing at her level.” When comparison mixes with competition everything turns ugly! Comparison robs destiny.

My eyes were always gazing too far in the distance, feeling as if I was being left behind. Never present to enjoy the moment. I was trying in my own strength to get to a place where my mind wasn’t yet prepared to go. God had places in me yet to heal and limiting beliefs that would keep me from maintaining the dream He had for me. If He gives things too early before we are ready, we run the risk of them slipping right through our hands. I was still stuck spinning on a hamster wheel, trying to catch up with someone else’s life. Until I let go of what I thought it should look like, He couldn’t give me what was truly mine.

The truth is, my back was about to break. I was carrying the weight of a ministry that God’s hands were meant to hold. God knew my legs were ready to give. He gently reached His hand out and asked if I wanted to jump off the wheel and hand back to Him what was His all along. He asked me to rest, to pause, and just give Him 40-days to prove to me His way was better. Thank God, this stubborn girl finally listened. I am forever changed. I have experienced what true freedom feels like. As I encountered Him, my eyes were opened to see things in a way I never had before, and I discovered that freedom is more about the journey, than the destination!

What are you carrying that God was meant to carry in your life? He wants to take the burden we’ve place on ourselves that we can’t possibly begin to hold.  Spend time thing week giving back to Him what was meant to be His all along!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

*This is an excerpt from my new book Shining Freely, coming the end of 2017!

“He who created you, He who formed you, has called you by YOUR name” (Isaiah 43:1 AMP, emphasis mine)

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me. I am not sure what planet this phrase originated from – but it couldn’t be more wrong. Words hurt. They can sink deep into the very core of our soul and twist our insides into knots. If you’re human at all, you’ve had a moment where careless words spoken over you made your heart drop to your toes. You see, words matter – because the words we believe become our identity. The picture of ourselves that forms from negative words thrown around and painful experiences can become cemented in our hearts – making the truth of who we really are hard to accept.

In order to experience freedom, we must know and embrace our true name, the name given to us by the one who created us. The God who created you longs to show you how He sees you so that He can transform the negative self-perceptions that have developed within your heart. God’s Word says, “The moment I entered the world he named me” {AND} said to me, “You’re my dear servant … through whom I’ll shine” (Isaiah 49:1-3 (MSG). “He who created you, He who formed you, has called you by YOUR name” (Isaiah 43:1 AMP, emphasis mine). Let’s be seekers of His name for us!

What’s So Important About A Name?

Psychologist Erik Erikson wrote, “There is no feeling of being alive without a sense of identity.” The messages we received from our earliest relationships either help us feel alive or far from it. Names become directional markers. How likely will the little girl who was always told she was stupid and worthless become all she was created to be? There are unfortunate consequences to negative messages. This little girl will likely believe exactly what she was told and refuse to try anything that would be deemed a “smart person’s” tasks. Limiting mindsets are often planted in our formative years of life and grow increasing stronger with age. Therefore, it is important for us to discover where the first seeds were planted and by whom. Taking an honest look at our family of origin helps uncover the roots system that produced the fruit of our self-concept.

In Biblical times the name a child was given held great significance. A name not only designated who they were to become but also the character traits they possessed. Therefore, parents often chose names that declared their future hopes and aspirations for their child. Jabez, however, had quite the opposite experience. We meet Jabez in 1 Chronicles in a short tucked away passage. The first words spoken over his life were literally a curse. Remember the Bible says that words are either “poison or fruit” (Proverbs 18: 21 MSG). His mother named him Jabez meaning “sorrow maker”. Right from the start Jabez was face with a label that could have become his identity. As Jabez grew older he cried out to God believing he had been created for more (4: 9-10 AMP).

Jabez is not the norm. We often don’t question as children the names we are called. We accept them as truth. Yet, Jabez, reached out to the true name giver nullifying the label he had received and the Lord answered his prayer for blessing. His life did not follow the label placed on him by his mother. He realized through Christ he was never meant to be a “sorrow maker”. God had a completely different view of him and his life transformed from sorrow to blessing.

God Renames To Reclaim

What I dreamed of parenthood and what transpired were two totally different movie reels. If I am being completely honest there were many moments I wondered what Tasmanian you-know-what had taken over my little girl. I had numerous names to describe her that I wouldn’t want anyone to know crossed my mind. Her behaviors were unpredictable, impulsive, and dangerous at times. In these moments, she acted nothing like her sweet, little self.

I had worn my carpet thin from praying late into the night over her and gotten to the point of shear desperation. My 2-year old had never grown out of the “terrible two’s” and actually had only grown worse with size. At age 4 the developmental pediatrician’s only answer was strong medication. Given that I was in the mental health field, I refused to believe that was my only option. In my experience, way too many kids had been placed on medication too early causing more symptoms to arise. “Most drugs prescribed for children have not been tested in children. By necessity, doctors have routinely given drugs to children ‘off label,’ which [ultimately] means the drug has not been approved for use in children based on the demonstration of safety and efficacy in adequate, well-controlled clinical trials.” (https://www.fda.gov/drugs/resourcesforyou/consumers/ucm143565.htm)

So, if there was another way, I was going to find it.

In the book The Love Dare for Parents, Kendrick states, “God repeatedly changed people’s names to honor them, encourage them, and help them view themselves differently.” He named them not after where they had been but for where they were headed! I knew my little girl hated how she reacted in the moments where she lost all control. Sadly, she had reached the point of not liking herself at all. It is heart breaking to hear your 6-year old say they want to die. When behaviors are so ugly and out of control it is almost impossible to begin speaking the opposite. Something had to change in my perceptions though if I was going to help her see herself differently. She was not her actions she was beautiful, she was a gift to me, she was creative, pure, and lovely. I realized I had to begin to speak over my daughter all that God saw in her even though with my earthly eyes it was far from what I was experiencing.

Many doctors, OT’s, holistic practitioners, and nutritional changes later we came to find out she had Sensory Processing Disorder along with severe Speech Articulation Disorder. One made it hard for her to express herself and the other made her body feel like she was wearing steel wool. We found with further testing that the main contributor to my daughter’s outburst was red food dye. We are beginning to discover more and more that the additives, preservative, genetically modified organisms, and dyes we are consuming are severely affecting our health and mood. This blog post is obviously not about healthy eating but I encourage you to do some research, because many of our mood problems and physical ailments can be dramatically changed by natural methods and dietary changes alone.

Some of you have been in your situation or reacted the way you have for so long that it has become your identity. My daughter began to perceive herself as this bad little girl who only brought pain to others. We can mistake our outward behaviors for who we really are. When we have hurts that are not dealt with, pain we are avoiding, or negative messages that replay over and over in our minds they seemly take over who we were created to be. I believe God renames us to help us see ourselves differently and to reclaim what the enemy has taken. How we see ourselves is so important to God because he knows that the enemy uses the pain of this life and hurtful words spoken over us to steal, kill, and destroy our destinies. God is the name giver! He longs to tell you how He sees you because he has a destiny to prepare you for!

Be blessed ~ Be a Light

*This is an excerpt from my new book Shining Freely, coming end of 2017!!

Let us strip off every weight that slows us down…and run with ENDURANCE the race God has set before us! Hebrews 12:1(Emphasis Mine).

I don’t know about you but change is hard for me. I am always thinking about how to change the things I don’t like myself and how I can guide others to change as well. Sometimes I wish I could flip a switch and turn my brain off. Seriously, it never stops.  My husband is always making fun of me because I talk to myself constantly – trying to figure out something, everything, anything!

Well, I guess all that thinking is good for something. I want to share with you what I have learned about change and what characteristics create the best conditions for change to be possible. The 7 healing habits described below, are based on years of personal experience and also the experience gained through the amazing individuals I have had the privilege to walk alongside on their journey to healing and change.

What I have found is, we all have a tendency to focus more on “How do I change?” and we forget to think about the things we are doing that make change impossible. Let’s discover together what characteristics most equip us to see the change we all want in our life!

My challenge to you is be to open. Be open to doing something new. Because one thing I know for sure is, we can never change until we do something we’ve never done before!  So here goes:

Seven Healing Habits

Healing Habit # 1 Be Reflective

We can’t change what we don’t know exist! Be diligent about slowing down, having quiet time to connect with God, and reflect on what is in your heart. Face it – don’t avoid it! Letting go of things that do not belong, frees us from our pain and gives us the opportunity to change into who we want to become. The Bible tells that we change by “renewing our mind” (Romans 12:2). One definition of renewing is to “repeat an action or statement”. We are constantly bombarded with things that seek to rob us of our peace, hope, and healing. We need a consistent inflow of Truth fighting the barrage of negative perceptions that creep in and steal our motivation to change.

Spending time allowing God to clear out of our heart anything that doesn’t line up with His perspective, breathes life, hope, and freedom into our dry and hurting places. His Truth is freeing! Create time for a daily practice of reflection – pitching what doesn’t belong and filling that space instead with the Truth in God’s Word. His Word – His very presence is healing to our soul and provides the encouragement we need to keep going when the excitement on the roller coaster of change has ended.

Healing Habit #2 Be Prayerful & Hope-filled

I heard the saying recently, “If you have time to worry, you have time to pray.” Prayer needs to become our default. My father used to say, “Prayer is the main entrée on the menu of a successful life.” I am trying to learn to be consumed by prayer instead of worry. I am realizing that the clarity and direction I am seeking, comes only when my heart is bent in prayer. Then my hope fills. When we fix our eyes on the One Who Is Able, our hope naturally increases. Expect Him to come through, even when nothing makes sense. It is when we are trying to do this thing called “life” on our own that our hope drains and once hope goes so does our motivation for change.  Let worry be a cue to sink to your knees. Then record what God does. Keep a prayer journal noting what you are handing over to Him and what He does for you in the process. We all need reminded.

Healing Habit # 3 Be Thankful

There is healing in living a life of thanks and gratitude. I believe we only truly live when we can be thankful for the moment we are in. Learn to be fully aware of the present with your eyes open wide to see and soak in the gifts all around you. Ann Voskamp realized through her tragic experience as a young child that, “The remedy is in the retina.” What we fail to look for, we fail to see. Slowdown from the crazy world around you by experiencing fully the blessings God puts in front of you. I have been amazed at how refreshing it is and how joy filled a moment can be when I stop to take in a simple blessing: the sun warming my face, the belly rolling laughter of my little girls, the sweet embrace of a loved one’s arms, the trust in my horses’ eyes, the dew shining bright in the morning sun. What joy a moment can contain when we pause to notice.

Start a habit of noticing every change you are making, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. My client’s always struggle to see how far they have come, because they are too focused on how far they still have to go. Savory every win. Write down the progress you are seeing so that you have proof in the ink that builds you up when the inevitable setbacks come. Unless we look for it, we fail to see it. By bringing awareness to even the slightest change, you give yourself grace, and grace is what picks you back up and keeps you moving forward.

Healing Habit # 4 Be Fun

This is hard one for me. I continually have to remind myself to not be so serious. Luckily, God gave me a husband who knows how to be fun! The other day I was stressing, going back to my old striving habit, and pushing myself relentlessly when my husband walked in. He said, “I know how to solve this. Come with me.” I tried my best to resist but God love that man, he wouldn’t quit. He drove me over to our 17-acre, nothing but wide open farmland, and made me soak in the sunset and the deer grazing in the distance. My stress began to melt and a smile started to spread across my cheeks. Then he lovingly pulled me out of our 4-wheeled Polaris, and insisted on pushing me on our girl’s spider web swing till every ounce of stress floated away with the breeze. I laughed. He laughed. And I realized in that moment fun and laughter can turn chaos into calm and frustration into peace. It settles our busy mind.

Make it a priority to add fun into your life. Pause. Sit. Laugh. Soak it in. Be fun! We all need a break from life to reset and give our brains the space they need to help us make better choices. They say a stressed brain is a stupid brain! Become smarter today by adding more fun into your life. Change happens when we can make good decisions and good decisions develop from a state of calm, not stress.

Healing Habit # 5 Be Physically Healthy

If you spend all your time getting your mind in order but fail to create a healthy lifestyle that nourishes your body, you are neglecting 1/3 of who you are. We are body, soul, and spirit. Our physical health is vital for spiritual and emotional health. God created us in such a way that our bodies can heal naturally, but we must provide it with the right ingredients to do so. Be diligent about researching healthy eating and adding exercise into your life. I am convinced that the processed foods we eat, jam-packed with all kinds of preservatives, additives, and genetically modified organism (which our body’s have no idea how to process) and the increase in sedentary activities are two of the greatest factors fueling the out of control number of mood disorders we see today. Kelly Brogan states in her book, A Mind of Your Own, that over 30 million Americans are on antidepressants today and that it is becoming one of the leading causes of disability in our country.

A full wellness regiment is beyond the scope of this blog; however, I encourage you to find out all that you can regarding natural ways you can heal and restore your body and mind. Understanding basics wellness habits are fundamental to healing and are the foundation of change. A couple places to start your search, are Dr. Kelly Brogan’s website www.kellybroganmd.com or her book (linked above). She is a psychiatrist’s who relies solely on natural methods of healing. Another resource is, Mark Virkler’s biblical based information on health and wellness at https://takechargeofyourhealth.today.

Healing Habit # 6 Be Connected

Surround yourself with relationships that encourage you to become the best version of yourself. It is vital that your relationships support you on your journey to becoming all that Christ has designed you to be. Learning to form healthy relationships and build a network of support, helps us to stay the course. Change is hard. We need others to pick us up when we fall-down, and refresh our hearts when we get discouraged.

We thrive most when connected with others. It is just a part of who we are! Take time to learn the art of creating healthy relationships and cultivate a support system. Your best chance for forming healthy relationships, happens when you are healthy yourself! Educate yourself on developing healthy boundaries, developing your true-identity in Christ, learning how to love who God made you to be, and cultivating self-awareness. Healthy relationships require work and only grown when we are purposeful and intentional. If you find your understanding of what a healthy relationship looks like is limited, and setting boundaries hasn’t been your strong suit be sure to check out , Michelle Farris’ blog, www.counselingrecovery.com.

Healing Habit # 7 Be Generous with Your Light

All healing is meant to be shared. As Joyce Meyer’s life testifies, “Your mess becomes your message.” There is a God-given purpose driven deep into your heart. You were created to be a light that makes a difference (Matthew 5:14). You were put here for a specific purpose at this specific time. Start being love. Start sharing your light. Start showing others how God sees you. This sets the stage for becoming all Christ intended you to be! Remember, is it the fear of uncertainty that keeps us from the change we want. Don’t be afraid to experiment. Facing your fear gives you the opportunity to discover who you are uniquely designed to be and where you shine your brightest!

So let’s get moving. Start putting a new habit in place today and create the right environment for change to take place in your life!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

*This is an excerpt from my book Shining Freely coming late 2017!

This post contains some affiliate links but in no way does it determine what I write about or how I write it!

But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green and they never stop producing fruit (Jeremiah 17: 7-8, NLT).

Fear is driven by thirst and I realized I was thirsty.

When I began the journey of writing Shining Freely three years ago, I was a completely different gal. Writing this book and encountering God through it has transformed my life. I loved Jesus, but I was still thirsty. Thirsty for accomplishments, titles, and a platform to prove my spiritual worth. I needed you to like me. To approve of me to feel okay. The beautiful thing about God is, when we truly ask Him to search our hearts – He does. He searches for and shines a spotlight on the places in us that will make us fall flat on our face in heartache if we continue to try and do life and ministry our own way. He knew that if I kept seeking your approval, I would always be thirsty. The “Am I enough” void continually threatened the growth He wanted to give me. So, He took me on a 40-day journey that changed my life forever.

I share this because I know many of you reading this feel the same. We are hard-wired to connect, to belong, and to be liked. It is a matter of survival. What I realized, though, as I ceased from my work (work that I thought all depended on me) for 40 days to be led by God, is that nothing can fill you more than an encounter with His heart.

I was listening to one of my favorite pastors, Steven Furtick, talk about “The Thirsty Trap” and it shined a spotlight on this approval seeking tendency in me. He said, “Everyone is thirsty. It is not a sin to be thirsty. It is where you go to get fixed that determines whether your soul will be satisfied.” The truth is, “Everybody drinks from somewhere”.

Did I mention I am a “do-er”?

Being a “do-er” sure made this 40-day rest a test that was really hard for me to pass. I resisted it the first time, sure I had heard God wrong, and I ended up in the hospital because of stress. I am just a tad stubborn. So, the second time He impressed it on my heart I listened. Anyway, it was during this season of rest that I realized how much I got my fix from doing. Being busy felt important. I had a real awareness moment that this thirst was destructive to the very calling I wanted to fulfill. My fix couldn’t come from titles  – even though it sounded really good in my head to be a Co-founder and Clinical Director. It couldn’t come from  accomplishments, the number of followers on my blog, or likes on Facebook either.  All those things can change in a moment and leave me thirsty for more.

Jesus told the Samaritan woman at the well, “those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a bubbling spring within them” (John 4:14, NLT). Jesus knew this woman was dying of thirst inside. Not the kind any man could fix. He was a Jew and wasn’t even supposed to be talking to this Samaritan woman, let alone be sharing a drink with her. It didn’t matter to Him that she had 5 failed marriages.

What matter to Him, was that her heart was empty and He knew how to fill it.

What mattered to Him was freeing her from the shame that brought her to the well in the hottest part of the day, because she didn’t dare show her face in public. He didn’t need the water He asked her for, He wanted to FILL HER. He went there on purpose with the intention of giving her Living Water. The kind of water that would cleanse her soul and forever fill the empty places inside her. He knew no other source could provide what she was seeking.

Where are you drinking from?

Are you dying for people’s approval? Are you caught up in the rat race of gaining accomplishments or things to finally answer the “Am I enough” question looming in your mind? Are you striving and pushing yourself to produce something on your own because in the end you fear God won’t provide as He promised? What things do you feel you need in order to be enough? Is it a relationship, a bigger house, a degree, and letters behind your name? Or do you fill your empty heart with alcohol, sex, shopping, food, caregiving, or a number on a scale? We are all thirsty in need of filling.

All fear is rooted in self-preservation. Will I be liked? Will I be enough? Will I have enough? The woman at the well was so focus on meeting her need in the moment that she almost missed what was right in front of her, waiting to fill her completely and fully. But God wasn’t going to let her leave that day empty. See that’s what He does, He never leaves us where He finds us! Her encountered with the Living Water that day changed her forever. She left the well a completely different gal. Free, head held high, and a heart filled to the brim and spilling over. She became a woman with purpose. A woman on a mission to spread the gift she received with everyone who would listen. All because of an encounter with Jesus. Never underestimate the power of an encounter (time in His presence) to heal you, restore you, to set your heart free, and point your feet in an entirely new direction.

I am now that woman on a mission. I have been changed by an encounter with Him. You see I was thirsty and He sought me out. He filled me in a way no amount of likes, titles, or accomplishments ever could. God, His love, His acceptance, His approval, His living, breathing water is the greatest gift and I want to share it with you. There is only one Source that never leaves us empty. A Living Water that never fails us.  We all long to be accepted, approved of, and loved. His presence is where we find it.

When I finally got it, nothing else mattered. God delights in me. God delights in YOU! He wants your heart, not so He can condemn you and point out all that is wrong, but so that He can fill you and show you all that is right about you!

Uncertainty drives our fears. Luckily for us, there is a Source of certainty that is always flowing waiting for hearts willing to be filled. Our thirst is quenched by God alone. In time spent with Him – time in the filling. You come, He fills, enough for each day, just like the manna. Learning how to cease from ourselves to take time to be still in His presence, is the key to a thirst filled life. It’s time! Time to lay down your self-protective strategies at His feet and let Him guide the way. He is the most gentle, loving guide you will ever have the pleasure of encountering!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

*This is an excerpt from my book Shining Freely coming the end of 2017!

Psalms 25:5- Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for you are the God of my salvation; on you do I wait all the day.

It is a pleasure to welcome, Amanda McGhee,  to the prayhealshine blog as our guest writer today! Amanda is a part of our SHINE leadership team and I am so thankful for her willingness to share her heart and a piece of her journey with all of you!

“Out of Order”. What do you think of when you hear that? Not the kind that makes your bladder scared when you’ve rushed to the bathroom only to find there’s an “Out of Order” sign on the door.  The kind of “Out of Order” that you feel when nothing in your life seems to have a set rhythm or seems to be making sense.  When you’re literally (and figuratively) out.of.order.

I’m in this season of my life where I know God is dealing with me to get myself in order. My house wasn’t the only thing God was showing me needed order, my literal and spiritual body needed order too. I felt a sweet tug at my heartstrings a couple months ago when He spoke gently to my soul about the chaos of our house being a soft mirror which reflected my relationship with Him; my frustration with a multitude of things in life were because I (emphasis on IIIIII) was, out of order. Even though I had everything I needed, nothing was in place. I had no chronic health issues but my motivation for being healthier was nowhere to be found.  It’s not surprising to know that my spiritual life wasn’t in order either; I have all the tools and resources I need to continue to grow deeper in my walk with the Lord, but no motivation to actually utilize them. I guess I was praying for order by osmosis or something. 

It doesn’t work that way. 

Several weeks ago, I was fed up with the chaos of our home. There’s been little discipline in maintaining an orderly house. When I knew we would be having guests, I would stressssss OUT. Now, there is no shame in my unexpected-visitor game!  It was a 2 day, 12 hours a day job but every room in our home has been purged, and organized.  Amazingly, it’s remained tidy ever since. But I was beginning to realized my home wasn’t the only thing out of order, there were things living inside me that needed addressed too.

It was a hard piece of revelation to sit with the day I realized that there are a plethora of reasons I’ve continually battled a weight issue. What I’ve learned in the past couple years, as I’ve allow God into the moments that have left me wounded, is that the emotional and physical traumas I endured for so long have played a far greater role than I’ve acknowledged. For ten years, I was told: I’d never be loved because of my weight and the way I looked, that nobody “fat” is ever successful. It wasn’t until recently that I realized I maintained my weight to prove this voice from my past wrong. 

But now, I am in the process of learning to look at my reflection and see who God sees, not who she said I was! For me this transformation takes place when I spend time in His Word.

There’s always been a gentle nudging of the Holy Spirit in my heart to spend more time in the Word, in prayer, in devotion…in any way that would lead me to more time with the Lord. Many times in my life, I would push it off because other activities would take priority. Something would happen that would grip my heart in panic and where is the first place I would go? To prayer. My daily praise was lacking. But lemme tell you something—if I get worried or scared, I’m on my face before the Lord.

I’m such a user.

That’s ugly. A user. As in, one who comes looking for a miracle when I haven’t been consistent in praising Him. Thankfully, His view of me is far more full of mercy and grace than my perception of Him.

What I’ve shared with you is a sliver of what the Lord revealed to me.  When I’m quick to notice where things are chaotic and lacking order, I get all bent out of shape. If I’m continually aggravated by something or someone, it’s usually a sign there’s something in my heart that needs healed (this revelation is not mine—it’s the byproduct of over twenty-five year relationship with a friend who became a clinical counselor). My attitude about a lack of order in a place where I think there should be was God’s way of pricking open my own heart to show me the areas of my life that are out.of.order or lacking discipline.

Ewwww….nobody likes to talk about discipline.

But what are we without discipline? I’m not talking about whoopins and spankins (whole other counseling session, whole other blog post, lol).  Did you know that discipline comes from discipulus, the Latin word for “pupil” (a student), which also provided the source of the word “disciple”? What are we if we’re not learning how to be a better version of who we were yesterday?

Every day we have to choose to take a step (or many steps) to be better. I’m in the muck of learning how to be consistent and purposeful in every action of my life, especially prayer, health, and keeping my home in order.  I have no doubt that when I begin my days spending time with the Lord, all the other learning (or discipline, whichever you’d like to say) will be easier because it’s through His power, not mine, that I get anything accomplished.

A big thanks today to Amanda for sharing her story and healing process with us! My hope is you will use her openness as the nudge you need to take a look at what may be out of order in your own heart.  Ask the Lord what needs His order and His view in your life. Only God’s view can provide the order we are seeking when everything around us feels like chaos!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light

BE A WARRIOR NOT A WORRIER

I am a natural – Worrier that is! But I am learning to become a Warrior. Some days are easier than others. Did you know you and I are always in a battle? Maybe not physically – but in our minds. The battle of what to believe is always raging.  Mix Martial Arts World Champion, Michael Chandler, said, “90% of success is between the ears.” He has learned that the first battle he has to fight before he ever steps into the ring with someone else, is the battle within himself. He said, “Every time I go into battle I focus on talking to myself. If I sit and listen to myself I’m going to hear negativity, doubt, and fear. But if I choose what gets dwelt on, I’m in the drivers seat.”

Many of us have been listening for way to looooong. The lies from our past feel like truth so much so that the promises that lay before us in God’s Word are what seem false and unobtainable. It is time to start talking to ourselves. We must choose to dwell on the one and only Truth that will lead to victory in this battle – GOD’S WORD! The enemy is the great deceiver – good at twisting our minds into knots and slipping in fear after fear. One of my go to verses when I need a reset in my mind is:

Philippians 4:8

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

When I bumped into this phrase “Be a warrior not a worrier” on Pinterest, it got me thinking. What would this look like in my own life?  Just what does a Warrior do differently than a Worrier? Here are some of my conclusions:

1. A Warrior knows She has God’s approval. A Worrier is always trying to earn it.
2. A Warrior recognizes the necessity of her role in fulfilling the commanders’ orders. A Worrier doubts she has what it takes.
3. A Warrior allows the battle to chisel her and refine her. A Worrier lets it define her.
4. A Warrior trust in God’s goodness. A Worriers doubts He will come to the rescue.
5. A Warrior uses REST strategically – refueling in God’s Presence frequently. A Worrier uses REST as a last resort only when exhaustion hits.
6. A Warrior knows how to accept orders as is.  A worrier is always trying to water them down to fit her ability.
7. A Warrior accepts discomfort for the sake of the mission. A Worrier is always looking for a way out.
8. A Warriors lives for an audience of ONE.  A Worrier lives to please EVERY-one.
9. A Warrior faces the giants before her and refuses to listen to their taunting voices.  A Worrier retreats at the slightest noise.
10. A Warrior sees the vision in terms of what “GOD” can do.  A Worrier sees the vision in terms of what “SHE” can do.

These are the frequent battles my inner warrior has to fight.  I would love to hear from you about how your inner Warrior wins out above the noise of Your Worrier! We all have a battle to fight. My prayer for you is your inner Warrior will overtake  your Worrier and you will see clearly just how necessary you are for the advancement of God’s Kingdom.

Be blessed ~ Be a Light!

Graham Cooke’s book “The Way of a warrior” was my inspiration for this post. He has such a way with words click here to find our more.

Some of the links in this post may be affiliate links. However, this doesn’t affect what I write about, what I choose to say, or what I recommend.

For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland. Isaiah 43:19 (NLT)

Sometimes the dreams we have come to what seem like an abrupt end, when in reality God is trying to point us in a whole new direction. This post is a little more personal in nature. It is an experience I wish wasn’t mine to tell, yet, one in which I cannot expect to escape me this side of heaven.

It only took me 4 years to admit I was angry at God. I wasn’t mad that he took my dad suddenly and without warning, but I realized I was mad at him for taking my dream. I was and always have been a “daddy’s girl”. He really got me. I was like him in many ways. Some things like his fiery red temper I would rather not have gotten, but he instilled in me a love, a craving for God’s Word that can never be taken from me. He was a man of prayer and there was something about his prayers that had a way of calming the storm within me. I will never forget his hands when he would lay them gently on my head and pray over me.  A peace would well up within me and I just knew everything was going to be ok.

My dad was a veterinarian, a horse doctor. This is where my sister and I got our love of horses. His passion became ours and ultimately turned into the birth of a dream. It only seemed natural after I got my degree in mental health counseling, that my family would start a Ranch for the hurting using horses.

Some of my fondest memories are of me getting to tag along with my dad in his work truck going from farm to farm. As a young child I thought magic came from his hands. He had a way with horses and it seemed as if there wasn’t any aliment he couldn’t cure. Why, when I needed him most was his life cut short? It is crazy to think that one moment in time can changed every laid out plan I had created.

He was suppose to retire soon and he told me that all he wanted to do was work on the Ranch with my sister and I. Then in a instant everything changed. I was at church and my phone rang. I just knew in my heart something was wrong. On the other line I heard the frantic voice of my mother’s best friend telling me to get to the hospital quick.

And just like that, he was gone.

The story of what transpired began to unfold. My dad had just finished leading worship at his church. He walked off stage, sat down by my mother, and no response. His sudden death left me rattled & confused. I remember thinking, “How I am going to go on without him?” Everything in me wanted to run from the ministry my family began – nothing made sense anymore.

He was the first on my list to call that morning. We had just received the news that our suburban home had finally sold (it only took 3 years) and we could now be on the look out for River of Hope’s new home. He was supposed to help us find the perfect fit – the perfect horse farm. But I never got to make that call.

It has been almost 5 years now and it was just the other day that I had a true epiphany. Crazy how long we can be blind to things we are holding onto and don’t even know it. I was reading an article about why we use horses and this paragraph grabbed hold of my heart. It said,  “If it is in your blood to love horses, you share your life with them. Our horses know our secrets; we braid our tears into their manes and whisper our hopes into their ears. A barn is a sanctuary in an unsettled world, a sheltered place where life’s true priorities are clear… Some of us need these reminders.” ~ Author unknown

I burst into tears as I realized I’d been running from the Ranch ever since my dad died. I simply didn’t want to do it without him.The barn was no longer my sanctuary and what used to feel like a sheltered place now was an ever present reminder of his absence.  But the truth is I needed a reminder of why I started doing this in the first place.

God asked me to give my dream back to Him – the dream of running this ministry with my dad by my side. It seems crazy really that I was still holding on as if he was ever coming back. Oh, it was gut-wrenching. I couldn’t believe how hard it was to let it go. I felt like I was losing my dad all over again. I had to lay it at His feet and let go of how I thought it was supposed to be so that I could embrace the path God has for me now. Once I let it go, peace flooded in and I began to see that He really was creating a path for me. He hadn’t forgotten or forsaken me. He was just waiting for me to be ready to come along.

He has called me to be a lighthouse pointing the way out of the darkness for others – a voice for the hurting. And whether he has me on a ranch with horses or some other place entirely, I will shine my light for Him! I don’t have all the answers I want yet, but I trust in the ONE lighting the way.

Maybe your dreams haven’t turned out like you thought either. Could it be you are holding onto something God is asking you to let go of so He can place in your hands a new beginning? Search your heart. Ask yourself if you too need to forgive God for things that didn’t work out as you hoped. Trust me, when we give back to Him what was never meant to be ours, He has so much more in store for us than we could ever image. It is hard, believe me – I get it. We may even feel like a part of us has died, but we have to be courageous enough to let go of our dream so that we can see the dream He has had for us all along. He has a path for you and me just waiting to be found.

Be blessed ~ Be a Light

Some of the excerpts from this post are from my new book, Shining Freely, coming in late 2017 and below is my self-therapy 🙂 book I published highlighting some of favorite prayers my father wrote and his nuggets of truth for life! My hope is his prayers will touch your heart as well.

This blog post contains affiliate links. However, this doesn’t affect what I write about, what I choose to say, or what I recommend. 🙂

You’re here to be light, bringing out the God-colors in the world. God is not a secret to be kept. We’re going public with this, as public as a city on a hill. If I make you light-bearers, you don’t think I’m going to hide you under a bucket, do you? I’m putting you on a light stand. Now that I’ve put you there on a hilltop, on a light stand—shine! Matthew 5:14 MSG

How would our experience of the world  be different if we could see ourselves as God sees us? With the challenges, trials, and pain this life brings, it is easy to lose sight of God’s promises and  who we are in Christ. Especially, when the pain continues or our wait seems long. I get it. I too have struggled in the wilderness moments of my life and second guessed the promises God has given me. The real issue comes down to this; the image of us that God sees in the mirror is so vastly different than what we have been believing about ourselves, that our hearts struggle to accept it.

Often when we begin to hear God’s vision of us and for us it can make us feel like a fraud inside at first. What do I mean by that? Well, if we look at examples in the Bible, God told Abraham his descendants would be as great as the stars in the sky, not when he was a young man in the prime of his life, but when he was old and had no children of his own. He told Moses he would lead and save a whole nation after he spent 40 years running in the wilderness because he was a murderer. He ask Gideon to lead his people to defeat the Midianites even though he was the smallest and weakest of all the men. Then, of course, there is Joseph. He had a dream that he would be in a high ranking position of authority, but first he became the one bowing down as a slave.

This is exactly why moving out of Rebuilding into the SHINING stage in the healing process is a challenge for many of us. We find ourselves saying, “You want me to do WHAT! How is that gonna happen?” We struggle to wrap our mind around what God can accomplish in and through us and our hearts keep saying, “No way, He can’t be thinking that way about me!” Yet, God see us in light of who we are to become and not through the lens of what our past contains!

God often uses what you see as your greatest weakness as the source from which He will grow your greatest gifts, abilities, and talents. Why would He do that? Because more than anything else He wants a relationship with YOU, and He wants you to depend on Him and experience Him in a whole new way. He longs for you to not just know about Him, but to truly experience Him as your Abba Father, Savior, Forgiver, Provider, Restorer, Healer, Refuge, Peace and so much more.

What is God trying to be for you in your struggle, that you would have never been able to experience without it?  Because in all honesty, if you could accomplish His dream for you on your own, you would. It is human nature to try and do it alone.  We really don’t like to depend on anyone else. That’s our culture.  I find that when I lose sight of the fact that my life’s purpose requires a duet, not a solo, that is when I struggle to believe in my calling the most. God truly is the greatest dance partner around – let Him lead the way.

The 4th Building Block To Healing – Shining

In today’s post we are wrapping up the final way that the construction process is similar to our healing process. In the 4th stage of the construction process after the foundation is set, the builder puts in place the necessary connections that will provide the house with light and water. We all know that in order for light to shine and water to flow, there has to be a connection to the source.

Connection is the key task of the 4th building block to healing. Shining is all about learning to depend on, rely on, and connect with the “Light” inside of us. But for that to happen we need to open our hands and embrace God’s view of us. This is where the exchange happens. We receive and accept God’s view of us and a natural outflow occurs. Jeremiah said, “It’s like a fire in my bones … I can’t hold it in.” It something we can’t hold in. There is a stirring that words can’t grasp that compels us to share our light with others.

Shining occurs when we experience a  mindset shift – where we accept His view as our own and then what flows out of our heart aligns with His vision of us! When we think differently we act differently. With the foundation of God’s truth in our heart, we can begin to envision the Designer’s blueprint for us and it is His blueprint then that overrides our old ways of seeing and being.

When we experience the realization that our identity is not based on what has happened to us but in God’s view of us, we find the freedom and courage to walk out His plan for our lives. Our wobbly first steps towards His promises enable His vision of us to become clearer and appear possible. Every step becomes stronger as we learn to trust in the power source that flows within us (aka the Holy Spirit). His power is what enables us to do “immeasurably more than we could ever think or imagine” (Ephesians  3:20).  Colossians 2:10 says that we are “complete” because of our connection or “union” with Christ. This means we lack nothing. The enemy is always trying to convince us in some form or another we aren’t enough, but the Holy Spirit is shouting right back, “YES YOU ARE!”

Jesus promised when he was leaving this world that He would equip us to do great works through the Holy Spirit that lives in us. “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes in me will do the same works I have done, and even greater works” (John 14:12, NLT).  And  “the Spirit that lives in you is greater than the spirit that lives in the world” (1 John 4 :4). My prayer for you is that “God’s Word (will be) so steady in you.” That your connection with Him will enable you to overcome anything the enemy throws at you! (1 John 2:14).

I filled the end of this post with verses because as we build our lives on God’s Word and start to see ourselves through the Truth etched within its pages, we learn to live a life that defies the odds against us. We become limitless because He who lives in us and empowers us is limitless! We are ALL called to be a light in this dark world in some way or another, but we only accomplish this when we are plugged into to the greatest Light ever known (Matthew 5:14). You will find all you need in Him to accomplish whatever He has placed in your heart to do. Overcome your past so that you can set your purpose free!

Overview

So, if we simplify the 4-building block process we have been looking at in the last few posts, it would look something like this:

• We scan the landscape of our heart and discover the obstacles and debris that are limiting our view.
• Then we allow God to break ground in our heart fully uncovering our hurt to receive His Truth.
• We persevere through the fight to relinquish our old limiting mindset by transforming our thinking so that it aligns with the Truth God revealed.
• Then we learn to accept God’s view as our own and connect with and rely on “The Light” within to accomplish what only a duet can!

Task Of The Week

Use the 4 building blocks to evaluate where you are in your healing process. Ask yourself, “Where am I in regards to the area of debris God has brought to my attention?”

1. Am I in the beginning stages of Awareness, trying to discover what limiting mindset, overwhelming emotions, protective strategies, and painful memories are tied to this place in my heart?
2. Am I in the Revealing stage, ready to face and uncover the debris within my heart to receive God’s healing perspective?
3. Am I in the process of Rebuilding, taking the truth God revealed to my heart and renewing my mind in it so that my limiting mindset can be transformed?
4. Am I in the process of Shining,  allowing God’s vision of me to be what I see in the mirror and connecting to Him as the ultimate power source that fuels my light in this area of my life?

It is important that you frequently re-evaluate where you are on your journey – remembering that the process repeats itself. Healing comes in layers as God’s light exposes only what we are ready and willing to deal with at the time.

If God’s Word became the mirror through which you saw yourself, how would the reflection looking back at you be different? Healing comes down to a simple yet complicated task –  learning to see ourselves and our circumstances through God’s eyes.  I believe it is only in the dark moments of our lives that we can learn to SEE the Lion within!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Romans 12:2

Have you ever been invited somewhere and questioned whether or not you would truly belong? When my husband and I were asked to attend a fancy political dinner my first thought was, “But I have nothing to wear”. I knew this farm girl didn’t have the right attire to attend such an event. So I went on a search for the perfect dress. I was looking for something classy, definitely slimming, and it had to coordinate with my husband’s navy suit. Finding the dress proved easy, wearing it confidently in a crowd where I felt I didn’t quite fit – a whole other story.

As I walked through the large ballroom doors with flowing fountains and marble fireplaces, my eyes nervously scanned the crowd. Oh, I had the right attire, but my mind was still telling me “You don’t belong”.  Everything in me wanted to run out of that ballroom slip out of my high heel shoes and right back into the comfort of my old muddy muck boots!

We do this all the time with healing. We start to take on a whole new look and then our mind convinces us we don’t belong.

If we look the Truth is easy to find, but confidently wearing the new Truth God reveals to our heart proves to be a much harder task. The process looks something like this: we become aware of the debris in our heart, we’ve open our hurt before God and received a new healing TRUTH, but then doubt and fear creep in and we questioned could this really be true?

God has the perfect dress (Truth) designed just for us ready to put on. The problem is our old pesky mindsets fight hard to be heard. We are sure others will see we are just posers; as our mind screams, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TRYING TO WEAR THAT FANCY DRESS?

We struggle to believe we are chosen, forgiven, accepted, loved, approved of, worthy, wanted, and invited by the very King of the ball. Then we run like Cinderella back to the comfort of the rags we’ve always known; thinking this isn’t possibly how God sees me.

Rebuilding: Opening Our Mind

In the last three post, we’ve been looking at the construction process to guide our understanding of healing. First, we saw how the builder scans the land and identifies the debris that needs cleared away. Then once the builder removes the barriers, he is ready to pour the new foundation so that the framing can begin. When we scan the landscape of our heart and place our hurt before God, a new view suddenly can be seen. The problem is this new view is so different than what we have always known that we struggle to accept it.

This is the dilemma we all face in the third stage of healing. Rebuilding, is about opening our mind to the Truth God reveals and then constructing a whole new way of seeing ourselves based on His view.

The rebuilding phase of healing we focus on transforming our thinking! God’s perspective of us must now become the foundation we build upon. This building block is one of the most challenging phases because old patterns are ingrained and continue to fight for their place. Our first inclination is to reject anything new and contradictory to the beliefs we have always held. A real tug-of-war will happen within us as we are learning to let go of the old and embrace the new and unfamiliar. Romans 12:2 encourages us to let God transform us by changing the way we think!

Owning our new look takes time. When you discover God’s perspective in this process the challenge will be learning how to own it in your heart and wear it with confidence. We have to learn to clothe ourselves in His Truth. Colossians 3 tells us to “Clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience … and LOVE”.

You can’t clothe yourself in something that you don’t believe exist for you. If you don’t first receive God’s love for you, or His tenderhearted mercy, kindness, gentleness, and patience towards you, then you will never learn to view yourself through His eyes. He loves you. He longs to be kind to you and gentle with your hurts. He is patient when you mess up and He can’t wait for you to allow His mercies to flow freely to you every morning!

The thing is when I walked into that ballroom that night, my dress was perfect. The problem was I was waiting for my heart and mind to see it. When God looks at you, all He sees is how beautifully you fit in. We have to realize that we cannot continue to wear the rags of our old limiting mindsets and expect to accept our new look. When we begin to see ourselves through His eyes, a whole new world we never believed could exist for us comes true. So my prayer for you is that you will learn to walk confidently in who you are in Christ and that His Truth will become known in your heart and owned in your mind.

Task of the week: 

I love the idea of the scripture tattoos because we simply need a constant reminder of how God sees us in order to transform our thinking to HIS. Learning to strengthen God’s perspective requires repetition and LOTS OF IT! We can’t keep old clothing hanging around putting them back on whenever we need comfort and expect to have a new look. You need to clear out your closet and intentionally choose to clothe yourself in how God sees you. 2 Corinthians 10:5 holds the key to freedom in our mind by telling us that anything that doesn’t line up with God’s truth we tear it down and take it captive so that our thoughts become obedient to God’s view! 

Identify what thoughts you need to tear down in your life and throw out of your closet. Anything that doesn’t line up with how God sees you is your cue to discard it! Get up every morning and choose to put on His Truth. Let His truth be a constant reminder of who and whose you are. Post it EVERYWHERE! Be persistent and keep at it until what you see in the mirror is what He sees.

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light

P.S. Click the title below to view a resource I have found to be a helpful guide in the healing process:

A Guide For Listening and  Inner Healing Prayer: Meeting God In The Broken Places

by Rusty Rustenbach

He reveals deep and mysterious things and knows what lies hidden in darkness, though he is surrounded by light. I thank and praise you … for you have given me wisdom and strength. Daniel 2:22-23

Imagine the scene. King Nebuchanezzar is furious. All his magicians, sorcerers, and astrologers just told him, “you are asking us to do the impossible -no man can tell you your dream”.  No second chances for these guys. They are instantly thrown into the lions den. Then the Kings goes on a tyrant and decides that he is fed up with all the wise men of the kingdom and says kill them all. Daniel and his friends just happen to be next on the chopping block. The king’s men storm in to tell them of their fate. Yet, Daniel calmly and wisely persuades them to give him more time and promises he will interpret the dream.

Daniel goes back home with his friends and they get on their knees as ask the Lord to reveal the secret of the king’s dream. That very night God gave Daniel a vision of exactly what the king had seen. Daniel woke up rejoicing and praising God for granting his request. God revealed to him what no man could have known and showed him the truth that rescued him from king’s decree.

The beautiful thing about God, is this is what He wants to do for us. In the places where our hearts are covered with layers of pain and hurt, he wants to reveal to us the secret that will free us. But first, we must seek Him and open our heart before Him. Realizing, as Daniel did, that we can’t do this on our own, but need God to reveal to us what only He can.

We discussed last week that healing begins with Awareness. Once the obstacles and debris have been identified, the natural progression is to remove the barriers. In the construction process, the builder prepares for a new foundation by breaking ground. He brings in the the exact equipment needed, and removes any barriers that would hinder the pouring of the new foundation.

God is the bulldozer. He has just the right equipment our heart needs. He is ready and willing to break ground in our heart so that the barriers can be remove and His truth can be poured in.

The Second Building Block To Healing Is Revealing

Revealing requires us to open our heart, allow God to  break ground, and clear away the debris that has settled there. This debris was never meant to stay. When we are hurt we carry the burdens of painful memories, overwhelming emotions, negative beliefs, and patterns of coping that add to our pain. Revealing is about uncovering those layers.

Shame will tell you to hide and keep it tucked away. But the truth is, you must reveal to heal. Revealing means we share what’s in our heart, not avoid it. This is the only way we can begin to see the debris through God’s perspective. Sharing opens the door to hearing the Truth our heart needs and experiencing the acceptance we all long for. Connecting our pain with God’s perspective helps us see ourselves and our world differently and prepares the way for a whole new foundation to be laid.

Obviously, we all have different experiences and varying degrees of debris that have settled in our heart. Some things may be too painful and overwhelming to process on your own,  and will require that you reached out to a professional counselor or pastor. The awareness process naturally leads us to a vulnerable place outside of our walls of denial and avoidance.  In this place of vulnerability, we need the support of others to provide a safety net that guides us and helps us to see the layers of debris in our heart through God’s perspective. Painful, abusive early experiences often need more of the demolition mode type work I mention in the previous post. Limiting mindsets and rigid, unhealthy patterns of coping  planted when we are young, grow deep roots. They can be hard to identify on our own because they have existed for years – even decades. If your awareness process has brought you to this place, I encourage you to reach out and begin your healing journey with a trusted professional that can walk alongside you.

At other times in our lives we are in need of some form of remodeling or re-framing. This is where the revealing process can occur during our quiet time with the Lord or in a conversation or prayer time with a trusted friend. Reflecting and spending time sharing our heart with God and others is an essential, healthy process we all need to maintain. Simply because “life” continues to happen. We get disappointed, hurt, experience rejection, doubt, and fear. It is all a part of life. Without regular heart checks things can pile up and affect our mood, mind, and will.

I recently found myself in a dark place emotionally. I felt depressed which led me to entertain a hopeless mindset and it affect my will to do the things God had been placing on my heart. I have been pushing for two years now to roll out the SHINE program while continuing to write a book, counsel clients, and be a mom and wife. I was worn thin from pushing so hard and had grown weary. I felt doubt creep in my heart – wondering if I had somehow made this whole thing up on my own and God really hadn’t  called me to this.

I knew it was time for some remodeling to take place in my heart.  My thinking wasn’t lining up with God’s Word. So I got alone with the Lord and asked him, “What do you want to say to me Lord about this doubt in my heart?” Then He led me in His Word to Psalm 33:15, “He fashions their hearts individually…” This verse hit right to core of my doubt. This wasn’t my dream. It was His that He fashioned in my heart.  This was the very re-framing my heart needed to change the direction of my mood, mind, and will.

When we take time to pause to seek God’s perspective, he can place the perfect message in front of us that set us free from our limiting view. He used a night vision with Daniel. He spoke to Moses through a burning bush, Joseph through dreams, Gideon an enemy soldier (look it up, amazing story Judges 7: 9-15) and Balaam through a donkey. Yes, I did say donkey. With Saul He was more direct. Saul and his friends heard God’s voice loud and clear (Acts 9:4-7).

As long as our heart is open to hear, God can use any means possible to speak right to our need. He sometimes uses other people, His Word, the lyrics in a songs, or through spontaneous thoughts & images that pop in our mind. God is limitless but we limit Him because it is hard to believe that God would want to pursue us and speak to us. I am always in awe when I think about how God spoke, directed, and connected with people in the Bible and how He does it with my heart still today. He wants to speak to you too and reveal the secrets in His Word that will free you. Will you open your heart to hear?

Task of the Week

If you brought awareness to an emotional pattern, limiting mindset, or way of protecting yourself that is holding you back from healing, evaluate whether this is a demolition process in need of a professional to help you see it through or if this is a remodeling project in your heart that needs a dose of God’s perspective. Then take that first step towards the process you personally need at this time.  All healing requires action.

Remember: The key to the revealing process is to receive God’s perspective in the place of what we came to believe. Discover what lies you been believing that don’t line up with the truth in God’s word and ask God, What do you want me to begin to believe instead? Then the process begins of laying down a new foundation based on the Truth God reveals to your heart.

Next week we will discussed the third building block to healing: REBUILDING – learning how to let go of our old beliefs and embrace the truth God reveals to our heart.  I hope you will continue this journey and join me next week.

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

It is LIGHT that brings about a rich harvest of every kind of goodness, righteousness, and truth.

                                                                                                                                      Ephesians 5:9 (GNT)

There is an alarming statistic that only 2 percent of people succeed in achieving their goals and dreams. That got me thinking. What stops 98 percent of people from accomplishing what they were meant to do? Motivational speaker Tony Robbins says, “Every change that happens in your life will come from a decision. A real decision to cut off any possibility except for what you’ve committed to.”

Healing will only come from an intentional decision where you decided your not going to give up on the “You” you want to become until you see it come to pass!

I believe the 98 percent of people who don’t accomplish the purpose God designed specifically for them, are all plagued by a limiting mindset! They have convinced themselves because of circumstances, pain, rejection, perceived failure – whatever it may be, that they aren’t enough! Every woman I have ever counseled has had some form of an I’m not_________________ enough mentality. (pretty enough, worthy enough, smart enough, good enough…) But what they often don’t realize is this mentality was birthed from a painful experience and it has felt true for so long that they stop questioning why. Painful experiences produce limiting beliefs that are connected to our behaviors today.  So my hunch is that 98 percent of people have a sense that they aren’t living the life they want to, but have a hard time pinpointing why.

All healing begins with AWARENESS!

It has amazed me how many times I’ve heard over the years, “I just didn’t realize that was still bothering me” or “I never would have guessed that incident from my past was connected to this.”  It is a common experience. We are avoiders by nature. No one enjoys peering into their pain. The problem is, what we aren’t willing to see, we can’t heal. They say ignorance is bliss. I say ignorance is dangerous. Ignorance just means a lack of knowledge and, luckily for us, knowledge can always be obtained. We just have to seek it. This is why light is necessary for healing. Without light, we remain in the dark.  Light exposes the painful moments we hold in our heart that have produced limiting beliefs and self-protective patterns that are holding us back.

Healing and the Construction Process

As I mentioned in the last post, healing is similar to the construction process in many ways. In essence as long as we remain on earth, we will all be going through some form of construction. Some of us are in demolition mode requiring a completely new foundation. This simply means, traumatic or painful experiences can create deeply entrenched, negative mindsets that we build our whole lives upon. These beliefs are often planted young and make it hard to accept God’s truth in our heart. In order to heal we have to tear down those beliefs and replace them with an entirely new view of ourselves that is based on God’s perception of us.  Others of us are in different phases of remodeling. This is where we are more convinced and accepting of God’s perception of us but are in the process of learning how to walk it out in our everyday life. Understanding where we are and what the process looks like will hopefully encourage you to stay the course and commit to not giving up on yourself until you see the result you are wanting.

At SHINE we believe healing happens in layers and flows in and out of what we call the 4 building blocks to healing: Awareness, Revealing, Rebuilding, and Shining. Each block builds on the next and requires the foundation of the last to accomplish its task. They are not a check off your list and done kind of process. Everyone wants a “just let me get this over with” pass, but the truth is we are all works in progress. Healing requires a committed mind set, and will not follow a straight line. Sorry to burst your bubble, but healing has many ups and downs and doesn’t always look so pretty.

So where do we start?

I love metaphors because our brain learns best when we add pictures to our words. So by comparing healing to the construction process, we get a better idea of what we are working with. The first step in any construction process is site preparation. The builder scans the plot of land, identifying the obstacles, rocks, trees, and debris that have settled on the property and hinder the progress of the project. To begin the healing process we too need to scan the landscape of our heart and be willing to see the debris it holds inside.

Awareness is a key first step because we cannot heal what we are not willing to see. Without being willing to look, we remain unaware of the the obstacles that have piled up within our heart and are holding us back. The debris most often created by our painful experiences is a limiting mindset. These are belief patterns that cause us to limit our actions and paralyze our purpose.  Awareness helps us recognize what needs cleared away so that a whole new view of ourselves becomes possible. Without awareness we are led by the products of our pain and it smudges our view of how the designer envisioned us all along. God makes no mistakes. No matter how far we feel we roamed from His design,  His vision of us and for us never changes.  It is never to late to begin the process!

Task of the Week

What debris has settled in your heart and is blocking you from moving forward in your healing process?  Most people don’t even know how they feel. They don’t recognize the negative limiting beliefs they are constantly repeating in their mind.  This is vital to begin to take a look at because our thoughts direct our actions. Meaning if I say to myself, “Everyone rejects me”, I will isolate myself or push others away so it lesson the possibility of more rejection. The problem with this strategy is all I end up getting is more rejection! Overwhelming emotions, limiting thoughts, and protective patterns are tied together and have a deeper root that needs addressed.

So I encourage you to begin to look again. Find an emotions list online and write out how you feel each day or pick up some crayons and just start drawing how you feel.  Begin to bring awareness to the emotional climate of your life? Then write down the thoughts that are tied to your emotions.  What thoughts are driving you?  Are you constantly self-critical? Do you feel not enough, too damaged, unworthy, all alone, hopeless? What do these thoughts cause you to want to do? What protective strategies have you put in place that are actually only serving to create more pain in your life? Remember, what you bring awareness to you can heal. Awareness gives you the opportunity to make intentional decisions that change your limiting thoughts and patterns!

Stay tuned for our next blog post as we will continue discovering what the healing process looks like with the second building block: REVEALING.

Bonus: Be sure to  sign up and follow our Shine Blog below and we will send you a PDF version of the common limiting beliefs and protective strategies we create that block our healing process!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works,which God prepared in advance for us to do.

                                                                                Ephesians 2:10(NIV)

If you have ever experienced the frustration of building a new home or a remodeling project, you know that things never go as smoothly as you might have envisioned. Excitement can quickly fade as the tension rises and roadblocks surface.

When my husband and I were looking for designs for our new arena, one stood out above the rest. We had the blueprints drawn up and the design was complete. Implementing the vision we had created on paper was a little more complicated, however. My husband knew how it was supposed to look,  but had never actually built one on his own before.  As the process went along, one thing became glaringly obvious. This was going to take way longer than I had hoped.  You see I am a planner, and my husband is more of an I’ll deal with it when it comes about kinda man.

So in my head, I had this idea about how it all would go and what it should look like and my husband was just going day by day. My biggest fear was not getting it done in time for our big fall event, he feared doing something wrong and not realizing it till it was too late. His fear often put a wrench in the process, delaying progress. Well, at least according to my timeline it did! What I realized in the end was his willingness to submit to the process no matter how slow, is what allowed the picture to become a beautiful reality.

Healing is a lot like the construction process. Some of us have an idea of how it should go and others would rather ignore the plan and hope it just works itself out. However, there is one thing we must realize. Whether we believe it or not, God has already completed our design- it is now our job to implement it. The problem is we struggle to see God’s vision of us and have a hard time knowing how to get His blueprint to become our reality.

Often we don’t even know where to start. Healing seems so far away and it is hard to know what it would look like. We disconnect more and more from our designer as one painful experience after the next builds up. We learned to define ourselves based on what has happened to us instead of how God sees us. We question, “Who would I even be without this pain?” Then all the sudden we find ourselves no where near where we though we’d be.

The more bad weather we experience, the more God’s blueprint gets blocked from our view.

I get it, some of you are saying, “But you don’t understand my life hasn’t gone as planned. My construction process has had too many bad weather days – too many delays.” I agree, some things are simply out of our control. My clients have shared stories of unbelievable pain and heartache over the years. Bad weather happened that was never their fault nor within their control and it made them question whether God even saw them at all.

Delays and interference are a normal part of the process. The Bible is clear about that.  Paul tells us to be alert that there is a real enemy wanting to stop and thwart all of God’s plans for our lives (1 Peter 5:8). Sometimes the interference is in the form of painful experiences beyond our control. Other times it results from people who have hurt us and made us doubt and question God’s plan and vision for us. Sometimes we become the interference when we avoid dealing with our pain. The debris from life storms can take over our heart making us believe we aren’t enough and have been forgotten.

I will go into depth in the weeks to come regarding how healing and the construction process are similar, but for now let’s get a clearer view of the ways we overcome interference:

1. Design and construction are an integrated system. You can’t have one without the other. Therefore, in order to overcome interference we have to reconnect with our designer. No matter what we have been through, God’s vision and plan for our lives doesn’t change. He is just waiting for us to team back up with Him!
2. Design is God’s job, construction is ours. Construction simply means to implement the designer’s plan. God is not going to design a plan for you and then not give you the tools to implement it. He’s is just not that kind of God. We have to stop questioning that God wants to use us. He already has our unique blueprints drawn up.
3. Every job is custom designed and site specific. Your design and construction process will not look like anyone else’s. STOP THE COMPARISON! We all have different experiences and that means we will have different obstacles to overcome.
4. Every job requires hard work and a lot of time to complete – always more than expected. We don’t want quick fixes that don’t last. We want real transformation that stands strong even when the bad weather comes.
5. Even after the initial building is complete improvements and renovations will always be ongoing . Houses require maintenance and so do we. We need regular heart inspections – continually letting God bring areas to our awareness that need His touch!

I hope this encourages you to reconnect with your designer and get His blueprint for your life.  Be sure to stay tuned over the next 4 weeks as we will be discovering where you are in the construction “healing” process. I will be giving you tools and explaining in more detail the 4 building block construction process that we at Shine Healing Ministries use to guide women to healing: Awareness, Revealing, Rebuilding, and Shining!

Be Blessed ~ Be a Light!

What you fix your mind on and determine to do will become who you are! 

Paul tells the church of Philippi to “FIX” their thoughts on what is ” true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable.”  And to “Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” This has often been my go to verse when I need to get myself off an old negative thinking tape and back on the right track.

But after reading this verse many times before, this time I saw something new.

In the very next verse Paul encourages them to “keep putting into practice all you have learned…everything you have heard from me and saw me doing. THEN the God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4: 8-9, emphasis mine).

So here you have Paul in prison telling those who are outside the four walls of his dark cell to Fix their thoughts on what is worthy of praise. He says do what you see me doing even in my darkest moment stuck here in a prison cell. Paul said he realized how to be content in all circumstances…whether he was full or hungry, whether he had much or little.

I am always drawn to people who push through and remain who they are no matter what circumstance surrounds them. How did Paul do it? His model was Jesus. He knew who he was through knowing Jesus intimately and he never forgot what he was doing it for. Once you know the “Who” God created you to be – no circumstance can change that.

Paul tells them what you know to be good and right and true KEEP doing it. KEEP at it. PRACTICE what you have learned and THEN peace will come.  Even in the trial, the dark  moments of our lives, we can feel peace if we maintain our focus on the good and not the evil around us.

I think we lose peace when we lose sight. When we allow our circumstances to lie to us and make us forget who we really are and what we were placed here to do, we lose our PEACE.

The problem is we hear, we see,  and if we are really inspired and motivated we do it once or twice. BUT we don’t keep at it long enough for it to become a part of us – for it to become who we are. And we especially don’t keep at it when the going gets tough. We allow excuses to take over and we listen to the wrong messages. The messages that direct us far from who we want to become.

I thought about the old phrase “monkey see monkey do” and became curious. I wanted to know how people train monkeys to do human tasks – tasks that are unnatural for them. Of course these days you can find a video on everything. So I saw how people in Thailand were training monkeys to pick coconuts.

The very first step in training a monkey to pick a coconut was not what you might think. The first thing they did was have the monkey watch a human spin and touch a coconut. The monkey struggled to be held against his will and clearly did not want to be there. But over and over the monkey watched and took it all in.

The next thing the trainer did was put his hand on the coconut with the monkey and began to spin the coconut together. The monkey resisted at first not understanding what he was being asked to do. But by the end he was spinning the coconut like a pro all on his own. When the monkey had mastered being comfortable with handling the coconut, the trainers set up low hanging coconuts to practice on. He struggled to break the coconuts free and then with each success he grew more and more confident. Now he was ready for the real deal. Swinging from tree to tree and breaking the coconuts free. By the end of the monkey’s training, he was able to pick 500 plus coconuts a day.

Are you seeing a pattern, yet? The monkey watched then he did. The monkey grew one step at a time, struggling to master each new task. He got good at the basics then became great at his trade. The problem is we see others who are at the top of their game and not when they were struggling to get there. We feel down on ourselves because we aren’t where they are and doing what they are doing. But are we willing to keep at it- no matter what the cost? No matter how much we struggle?

How do we become the person that seems so out of reach for us? How do we accomplish what is unnatural for us? Monkeys weren’t born to be coconut pickers. If they can learn to do something completely out of the norm, can’t we?

Les Brown is a motivational speaker whose life wasn’t always so motivational. He recounts the many struggles he had to overcome to get to the “Les” we see today. I love his story of refusing to accept a no and spending countless hours and time learning, growing, and intentionally putting in his mind the messages that would help him reach his goals. He said “I was HUNGRY! People that are hungry are willing to do the things today others won’t do in order to have the things tomorrow that others won’t have.”

The thing about Les is he chose his mentors wisely. He found people who were living the dream he had in his heart and watched and watched and watched some more. He soaked it in and intentionally chose the messages he listened to. His mentor once told him “You must program yourself to succeed.” He instructed Les to read 10-15 pages of something positive every day because “faith comes by hearing and hearing and hearing”.

I find I have to continually fill myself with truth or else the negative begins to creep its way back in. Yesterday, wasn’t a good day. I struggled to see the purpose in the countless hours I am putting towards the dream in my heart. I couldn’t even motivate myself to write this blog. But this morning I woke up determine to throw out the old tapes that make me think small and intentionally put the right message in my heart. And I began to write…

What old tapes do you need to throw out so you can make room for the right messages? Messages that will encourage you to become the “WHO” you never thought you could be? Graham Cooke says, “What we focus on we empower.” What are you empowering in your life? Will what you are empowering help you become the “You” – you are dreaming of? If not, I suggest you choose your mentors and messages more wisely!

Be Blessed ~ Be a LIGHT!

However, he has given each one of us a special gift through the generosity of Christ. Ephesians 4:7

What do we do when life doesn’t work out as we planned? My daughter turned 9 this week and unfortunately she woke up puking instead of celebrating. It was definitely a bummer and not the way we wanted her birthday to go.

Fortunately, for her,  the next day she bounced back to life again. But for some of us, we can feel like the bounce back never comes. Like life is just one loooooooong bad day. Somehow our Cinderella fairy tales don’t seem so dreamy anymore and we wonder, “How did I get here?”

This world can throw punches – one hit after the next. Knocking us down again and again.  Then to add insult to injury our own mind chimes in and beats us up some more.  We tell ourselves horrible things – things we would never want anyone else to hear.

Oh come on admit it – are you your best cheerleader or are you more like a drill sergeant  that points out every missed step? One thing I know, is the punches will always hurt worse when you turn your back on yourself when you need yourself the most.

Ephesians 4:7-12 tells us that God gave each one of us a special gift in order that we may build up others.  I think the devil tries to keep us distracted with all these messy, painful, and frustrating moments to keep us from opening our gift.

My daughter may have been sick on her birthday, but we still opened gifts. Fortunately for us – none of the bad, the ugly, the shameful things that have happened to us can negate God’s gift. The bible says that God knew you before you were even born, and set you apart by appointing you to a special task. (Jeremiah 1: 5)

This is my “WHY”.  I want to be a light that helps others see theirs. I don’t want anyone in my reach to miss opening their unique gift to the world. Every heart deserves to be rescued. Rescued from the pit of “I’m not enough” and encouraged to be all they were created for!

That devil – he’s sneaky. He is good at keeping us from believing God would care enough to give us a unique gift.  He has convince countless hearts they are too unworthy, too damaged, too disgusting, too unloveable to be used for anything good.

Pastor Steve Furtick says these painful moments in our lives are just “scenes not the story”. God is not finished. Don’t let a scene direct your entire story.  Don’t let the devil lie to you that just because something bad happened to you – a bad ending is inevitable.

NO, IT IS JUST NOT TRUE. NO MATTER WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU, YOU HAVE A GIFT MEANT ONLY FOR YOU JUST WAITING TO BE OPENED!

You can change the ending to your story. Your story doesn’t have to follow the script your hurt begs you write.  Sometimes the biggest fear we have to overcome is the fear of who we think we aren’t! Our messy ugly scenes can lie to us. They make us believe,  “that’s all she wrote”.

Don’t let the devil convince you any longer that you don’t have a WHY! YOU have a specific WHY deep inside of YOU that only YOU can do.  Be determined to not let another year pass without discovering your WHY and refuse to let the painful scenes you’ve experienced keep you from creating the ending God has been dreaming for you all along!!!

Share your WHY with the World. I’d love to hear your unique WHY below.

Be Blessed – Be a LIGHT!

“If your reason isn’t big enough, your excuses will be!” ~unknown